Friday, November 09, 2007

To Pee or not to Pee, that is the struggle.

I went to school with my dad today(Teacher @ Lane Middle School) so that my appointment/check in which is part of my probationary terms could be met. I have to take a urine drug screen to make sure I am "staying clean" which is very confusing in the first place. I got in trouble because of Alcohol(OWI on Sept. 23rd), now they make me pay $30 every 3 months to take a pee test. I swear, they will nit pick at you financially for as long as they (government) possibly can. It is frustrating, but I am big enough to grin and bare it. When I was taking the drug test though, I was made aware of some bladder dysfunction that is happening to me. It's like this. There could be liquid in my bladder, and when I want to pee; I can't. I could be lying in bed, trying to go to sleep, and I will have to get up and go take care of it...only to find out that I can't go. It is so frustrating. So the guy at the collection center did a really good job of reminding me of my problem. It sucked, but I am much bigger than that situation as well.

At Lane, I stayed in my dad's office for the most part. I had to finish up some reading/studying for the Young Life Leader training session # 2 that will take place at Taylor Fort Wayne @ 1:00. My dad is a P.E. teacher and his office is in the boys locker room. When I was in there, one of the kids, I think he was a 6th or 7th grader came into use the restroom. He started singing out loud while he was in there. Unaware of my presence he sang on and I listened. He was singing, "I Stand Alone" by Steve Perry. It was so strange to listen to a young kid sing this song. I don't know anything about this kid. But his voice sounded very unsure, and when other kids took a sneak peak in the locker room and asked what he was doing, he would say, "I'm just taking a break!" the kids would ask "Why?" he would say, "because I want to!" He was very short, and it made me want to open the door and just talk with him. Instead I just listened. I felt really bad for this kid. Click on that link and read the lyrics. Pretty intense for such a young kid. He must think pretty deep, or have a lot of compounding issues in his life.

It's official! I got a letter in the mail from the BMV saying that on November 25, I can get my license back. I just have to pay $150.00, provide an SR-50 & SR-22 and I will be good to go! That is so good to hear, so good! MISSION NOW=GET CAR!

I am so excited to start my job on Monday.

Why are people so afraid to learn about themselves? If people weren't so nervous to dive into their own thought process and emotions, and actually changed themselves, even in little ways. It would change the world. Why do people stay the same when they know it would be better for them to do differently? Even in small things; a fellow Christian points out something that you know is something you need to work on....but you don't. I don't like that about people, it is especially frustrating when you talk with someone about something and they agree to your face, but then make no effort to change. It is so awesome when you find someone who is willing to change their life when they know they should.

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